Francusko-angielska dwujÄzyczna ksiÄ ĆŒka
Lâassesseur de collĂšge sây connaissait, puisquâil avait Ă©tĂ© plusieurs fois commis pour instruire des affaires criminelles, lorsquâil Ă©tait encore au Caucase.
â De quelle maniĂšre, par quel hasard, cela a-t-il pu se produire? Le diable seul saurait sây reconnaĂźtre! fit-il enfin avec un geste de dĂ©couragement.
The committee-man was experienced in such matters, for he had been often officially deputed to conduct criminal investigations while in the Caucasus. âBut then how and by what trick of fate has the thing happened?â he said to himself with a gesture of discouragement. âThe devil must be at the bottom of it.â
Cependant le bruit de cet Ă©vĂ©nement extraordinaire avait couru dans toute la capitale et, comme il est dâusage, non sans sâagrĂ©menter de petites particularitĂ©s nouvelles.
Meanwhile the rumour of this extraordinary event had spread all over the city, and, as is generally the case, not without numerous additions.
Ă cette Ă©poque, tous les esprits Ă©taient portĂ©s vers le miraculeux: le public se trouvait encore sous lâimpression dâexpĂ©riences rĂ©centes, relatives au magnĂ©tisme. Lâhistoire des chaises dansantes, dans la rue KoniouchennaĂŻa, Ă©tait encore toute fraĂźche; il nây avait donc rien dâĂ©tonnant Ă ce que bientĂŽt on en vint Ă dire que le nez de lâassesseur de collĂšge Kovaliov se promenait tous les jours, Ă trois heures prĂ©cises, sur la Perspective de Nievsky. Lâaffluence des curieux Ă©tait tous les jours Ă©norme.
At that period there was a general disposition to believe in the miraculous; the public had recently been impressed by experiments in magnetism. The story of the floating chairs in Koniouchennaia Street was still quite recent, and there was nothing astonishing in hearing soon afterwards that Major Kovaloffs nose was to be seen walking every day at three oâclock on the Neffsky Avenue. The crowd of curious spectators which gathered there daily was enormous.
Quelquâun sâavisa tout Ă coup de dire que le nez se trouvait dans le magasin de Jounker; et le magasin fut assiĂ©gĂ© par une telle foule, que la police elle-mĂȘme dut sâen mĂȘler et rĂ©tablir lâordre.
On one occasion someone spread a report that the nose was in Junkerâs stores and immediately the place was besieged by such a crowd that the police had to interfere and establish order.
Un spĂ©culateur Ă mine grave, portant favoris, qui vendait des gĂąteaux secs Ă lâentrĂ©e des thĂ©Ăątres, fit fabriquer exprĂšs de beaux bancs solides, quâil plaça devant le magasin et sur lesquels il invitait obligeamment les assistants Ă monter, pour le prix modique de quatre-vingts kopecks.
A certain speculator with a grave, whiskered face, who sold cakes at a theatre door, had some strong wooden benches made which he placed before the window of the stores, and obligingly invited the public to stand on them and look in, at the modest charge of twenty-four kopecks.
Un colonel qui avait de trĂšs beaux Ă©tats de service sortit mĂȘme exprĂšs pour cela de meilleure heure quâĂ lâordinaire, et il ne rĂ©ussit quâĂ grandâpeine Ă se frayer un passage Ă travers la foule; mais Ă sa grande indignation, il aperçut, dans la vitrine du magasin, au lieu du nez, un simple gilet de flanelle et une lithographie qui reprĂ©sentait une jeune fille reprisant un bas, tandis quâun jeune Ă©lĂ©gant, avec une barbiche et un gilet Ă grands revers, la regardait de derriĂšre un arbre â lithographie qui se trouvait Ă cette mĂȘme place depuis plus de dix ans.
A veteran colonel, leaving his house earlier than usual expressly for the purpose, had the greatest difficulty in elbowing his way through the crowd, but to his great indignation he saw nothing in the store window but an ordinary flannel waistcoat and a coloured lithograph representing a young girl darning a stocking, while an elegant youth in a waistcoat with large lappels watched her from behind a tree. The picture had hung in the same place for more than ten years.
Le colonel sâĂ©loigna en disant avec dĂ©pit:
â Comment peut-on troubler le monde avec des rĂ©cits aussi stupides et aussi peu vraisemblables!
The colonel went off, growling savagely to himself, âHow can the fools let themselves be excited by such idiotic stories?â
Puis ce fut un autre bruit: le nez du major Kovaliov se promenait non sur la Perspective de Nievsky, mais dans le jardin de Tauride; on ajoutait mĂȘme quâil sây trouvait depuis longtemps dĂ©jĂ , que le fameux Kozrev-Mirza, lorsquâil y sĂ©journait encore, sâĂ©tonnait beaucoup de ce jeu bizarre de la nature. Quelques Ă©tudiants de lâacadĂ©mie de chirurgie se rendirent exprĂšs dans ce jardin.
Then another rumour got abroad, to the effect that the nose of Major Kovaloff was in the habit of walking not on the Neffsky Avenue but in the Tauris Gardens. Some students of the Academy of Surgery went there on purpose to see it.
Une grande dame écrivit au surveillant, le priant de montrer à ses enfants ce rare phénomÚne et de leur donner à cette occasion quelques explications instructives et édifiantes pour la jeunesse.
A high-born lady wrote to the keeper of the gardens asking him to show her children this rare phenomenon, and to give them some suitable instruction on the occasion.
Tous ces incidents faisaient la joie des hommes du monde, habituĂ©s des raouts, trĂšs Ă court en ce moment dâanecdotes capables de dĂ©rider les dames.
All these incidents were eagerly collected by the town wits, who just then were very short of anecdotes adapted to amuse ladies.
Par contre, la minorité des gens graves et bien pensants manifestait un vif mécontentement.
On the other hand, the minority of solid, sober people were very much displeased.
Un monsieur trĂšs indignĂ© disait mĂȘme quâil ne comprenait pas comment, dans notre siĂšcle Ă©clairĂ©, des inepties semblables pouvaient se rĂ©pandre, et il se trouvait trĂšs surpris de voir que le gouvernement ne finissait pas par diriger son attention de ce cĂŽtĂ©. Le monsieur en question appartenait Ă©videmment Ă la catĂ©gorie des gens qui voudraient immiscer le gouvernement dans tout, mĂȘme dans leurs querelles quotidiennes avec leurs moitiĂ©s.
One gentleman asserted with great indignation that he could not understand how in our enlightened age such absurdities could spread abroad, and he was astonished that the Government did not direct their attention to the matter. This gentleman evidently belonged to the category of those people who wish the Government to interfere in everything, even in their daily quarrels with their wives.
AprĂšs cela⊠Mais ici les Ă©vĂ©nements sâenveloppent encore une fois dâun brouillard, et ce qui vient aprĂšs demeure absolument inconnu.
But here the course of events is again obscured by a veil.
III
III
DâĂ©tranges Ă©vĂ©nements se passent dans ce monde, des Ă©vĂ©nements qui sont mĂȘme parfois dĂ©nudĂ©s de toute vraisemblance: voilĂ que le mĂȘme nez qui circulait sous les espĂšces dâun conseiller dâĂtat et faisait tant de bruit dans la ville se trouva, comme si de rien nâĂ©tait, de nouveau Ă sa place, câest-Ă -dire par consĂ©quent entre les deux joues du major Kovaliov.
Strange events happen in this world, events which are sometimes entirely improbable. The same nose which had masqueraded as a state-councillor, and caused so much sensation in the town, was found one morning in its proper place, i.e. between the cheeks of Major Kovaloff, as if nothing had happened.
Ceci arriva en avril, le 7 du mois. En sâĂ©veillant, le major jeta par hasard un regard dans la glace et aperçut un nez; il y porta vivement la main: câen Ă©tait un effectivement!
â Eh! se dit Kovaliov.
Et de joie il faillit exĂ©cuter, nu-pieds, une danse Ă©chevelĂ©e Ă travers la chambre; mais lâentrĂ©e dâIvan lâen empĂȘcha. Il se fit apporter immĂ©diatement de lâeau et, en se dĂ©barbouillant, il se mira encore une fois dans la glace; le nez Ă©tait lĂ . En sâessuyant avec sa serviette, il y jeta un nouveau regard; le nez Ă©tait lĂ !
This occurred on 7th April. On awaking, the Major looked by chance into a mirror and perceived a nose. He quickly put his hand to it; it was there beyond a doubt!
âOh!â exclaimed Kovaloff. For sheer joy he was on the point of performing a dance barefooted across his room, but the entrance of Ivan prevented him. He told him to bring water, and after washing himself, he looked again in the glass. The nose was there! Then he dried his face with a towel and looked again. Yes, there was no mistake about it!
â Regarde donc, Ivan, il me semble que jâai un bouton sur le nez, dit-il Ă son domestique.
Et il pensait en mĂȘme temps:
«Câest cela qui sera joli, lorsque Ivan va me dire: mais non, monsieur, non seulement il nây a pas de bouton, mais le nez lui-mĂȘme est absent.»
âLook here, Ivan, it seems to me that I have a heat-boil on my nose,â he said to his valet. And he thought to himself at the same time, âThat will be a nice business if Ivan says to me âNo, sir, not only is there no boil, but your nose itself is not there!ââ
Mais Ivan répondit:
â Il nây a rien, monsieur, on ne voit aucun bouton sur votre nez.
But Ivan answered, âThere is nothing, sir; I can see no boil on your nose.â
â Câest bon, cela, que le diable mâemporte! se dit Ă part soi le major, en faisant claquer ses doigts.
En ce moment le barbier Ivan Iakovlievitch passa sa tĂȘte par la porte timidement, comme un chat quâon viendrait de fouetter pour avoir volĂ© du lard.
âGood! Good!â exclaimed the Major, and snapped his fingers with delight. At this moment the barber, Ivan Jakovlevitch, put his head in at the door, but as timidly as a cat which has just been beaten for stealing lard.
â Dis-moi dâabord: tes mains sont-elles propres? lui cria Kovaliov en lâapercevant.
â Oui, monsieur.
â Tu mens.
â Par ma foi, elles sont parfaitement propres, monsieur.
â Tu sais, prends garde!
âTell me first, are your hands clean?â asked Kovaloff when he saw him.
âYes, sir.â
âYou lie.â
âI swear they are perfectly clean, sir.â
âVery well; then come here.â
Kovaliov sâassit, Ivan Iakovlievitch lui noua une serviette sous le menton et en un instant, Ă lâaide du blaireau, lui transforma toute la barbe et une partie des joues en une crĂšme telle quâon en sert chez les marchands le jour de leur fĂȘte.
Kovaloff seated himself. Jakovlevitch tied a napkin under his chin, and in the twinkling of an eye covered his beard and part of his cheeks with a copious creamy lather.
â Voyez-vous cela, se dit-il, en jetant un coup dâĆil sur le nez. Puis il pencha la tĂȘte et lâexamina de cĂŽtĂ©:
â Le voilĂ lui-mĂȘme en personne⊠vraiment, quand on y songe⊠continua-t-il en poursuivant son monologue mental et en attachant un long regard sur le nez.
Puis, tout doucement, avec des prĂ©cautions infinies, il leva en lâair deux doigts, afin de le saisir par le bout: tel Ă©tait le systĂšme dâIvan Iakovlievitch.
âThere it is!â said the barber to himself, as he glanced at the nose. Then he bent his head a little and examined it from one side. âYes, it actually is the noseâreally, when one thinksââ he continued, pursuing his mental soliloquy and still looking at it. Then quite gently, with infinite precaution, he raised two fingers in the air in order to take hold of it by the extremity, as he was accustomed to do.
â Allons, allons, prends garde! sâexclama Kovaliov.
Ivan Iakovlievitch laissa tomber ses bras et se troubla comme il ne sâĂ©tait encore jamais troublĂ© de sa vie. Finalement, il se mit Ă chatouiller tout doucement du rasoir le menton du major, et quoiquâil fĂ»t trĂšs difficile de faire la barbe sans avoir un point dâappui dans lâorgane olfactif, il rĂ©ussit pourtant, en appliquant son pouce rugueux contre la joue et la mĂąchoire infĂ©rieure du major, Ă vaincre tous les obstacles et Ă mener Ă bonne fin son entreprise.
âNow then, take care!â Kovaloff exclaimed. Ivan Jakovlevitch let his arm fall and felt more embarrassed than he had ever done in his life. At last he began to pass the razor very lightly over the Majorâs chin, and although it was very difficult to shave him without using the olfactory organ as a point of support, he succeeded, however, by placing his wrinkled thumb against the Majorâs lower jaw and cheek, thus overcoming all obstacles and bringing his task to a safe conclusion.
Lorsque tout fut prĂȘt, Kovaliov sâempressa de sâhabiller, prit un fiacre et se rendit tout droit Ă la pĂątisserie. En entrant, il cria de loin:
â Garçon, une tasse de chocolat!
Et il courut aussitĂŽt vers la glace: le nez Ă©tait lĂ ! Il se retourna triomphant et jeta un coup dâĆil ironique sur deux officiers qui se trouvaient lĂ et dont lâun possĂ©dait un nez pas plus gros quâun bouton de gilet.
When the barber had finished, Kovaloff hastened to dress himself, took a droshky, and drove straight to the confectionerâs. As he entered it, he ordered a cup of chocolate. He then stepped straight to the mirror; the nose was there! He returned joyfully, and regarded with a satirical expression two officers who were in the shop, one of whom possessed a nose not much larger than a waistcoat button.
AprĂšs quoi il se rendit au bureau de lâadministration oĂč il faisait des dĂ©marches dans le but dâobtenir une place de gouverneur, ou Ă dĂ©faut un emploi dâhuissier. En traversant la salle de rĂ©ception, il jeta un coup dâĆil dans la glace: le nez Ă©tait lĂ .
After that he went to the office of the department where he had applied for the post of vice-governor of a province or Government bailiff. As he passed through the hall of reception, he cast a glance at the mirror; the nose was there!
Puis il alla rendre visite à un autre assesseur de collÚge ou major, esprit trÚs ironique, à qui il avait coutume de dire en réponse à ses observations gouailleuses:
â Toi, je te connais, tu es piquant comme une Ă©pingle.
Chemin faisant, il sâĂ©tait dit:
â Si le major lui-mĂȘme nâĂ©clate pas de rire Ă ma vue, ce sera lâindice le plus certain que tout se trouve Ă sa place accoutumĂ©e.
Mais lâassesseur de collĂšge ne dit rien.
â Câest bien, câest bien, câest parfait, se dit Ă part lui Kovaliov.
Then he went to pay a visit to another committeeman, a very sarcastic personage, to whom he was accustomed to say in answer to his raillery, âYes, I know, you are the funniest fellow in St Petersburg.â On the way he said to himself, âIf the Major does not burst into laughter at the sight of me, that is a most certain sign that everything is in its accustomed place.â But the Major said nothing. âVery good!â thought Kovaloff.
En revenant, il rencontra la femme de lâofficier supĂ©rieur Podtotchine avec sa fille; il les aborda et fut accueilli par elles avec de grandes dĂ©monstrations de joie: donc il ne prĂ©sentait aucune dĂ©fectuositĂ©! Il sâentretint trĂšs longtemps avec elles et, sortant sa tabatiĂšre, se mit Ă bourrer exprĂšs de tabac son nez des deux cĂŽtĂ©s, en se disant: «Tenez, je me moque bien de vous, femmelettes, coquettes que vous ĂȘtes!⊠et quant Ă la fille, je ne lâĂ©pouserai tout de mĂȘme pas. Comme cela â par jeu â je veux bien.»
As he returned, he met Madame Podtotchina with her daughter. He accosted them, and they responded very graciously. The conversation lasted a long time, during which he took more than one pinch of snuff, saying to himself, âNo, you havenât caught me yet, coquettes that you are! And as to the daughter, I shanât marry her at all.â
Et, depuis lors, le major Kovaliov se promenait comme si de rien nâĂ©tait, et sur la Perspective de Nievsky et dans les thĂ©Ăątres et partout. Et son nez aussi, comme si de rien nâĂ©tait, restait sur sa figure sans mĂȘme avoir lâair de sâĂȘtre jamais absentĂ©.
After that, the Major resumed his walks on the Neffsky Avenue and his visits to the theatre as if nothing had happened. His nose also remained in its place as if it had never quitted it.
Et depuis lors on voyait le major Kovaliov toujours de bonne humeur, toujours souriant, courtisant toutes les jolies personnes sans exception aucune.
From that time he was always to be seen smiling, in a good humour, and paying attentions to pretty girls.
Telle fut lâhistoire qui se passa dans la capitale du nord de notre vaste empire!
Such was the occurrence which took place in the northern capital of our vast empire.
Maintenant, tout bien pesĂ©, nous nous apercevons quâelle offre beaucoup de cĂŽtĂ©s invraisemblables. Sans parler du fait vraiment Ă©trange de la fuite miraculeuse du nez, et de sa prĂ©sence en diffĂ©rents endroits sous lâaspect dâun conseiller dâĂtat. Comment Kovaliov ne comprit-il pas quâon ne pouvait dĂ©cemment publier une annonce sur un nez perdu?
On considering the account carefully we see that there is a good deal which looks improbable about it. Not to speak of the strange disappearance of the nose, and its appearance in different places under the disguise of a councillor of state, how was it that Kovaloff did not understand that one cannot decently advertise for a lost nose?
Non que je veuille dire par lĂ quâil lui aurait fallu la payer beaucoup trop cher; cela, câest une bagatelle, et je ne suis pas du tout du nombre des gens cupides. Mais ce nâest pas convenable, cela ne se fait pas, ce nâest pas bien.
I do not mean to say that he would have had to pay too much for the advertisementâthat is a mere trifle, and I am not one of those who attach too much importance to money; but to advertise in Such a case is not proper nor befitting.
Et puis encore⊠comment le nez sâĂ©tait-il trouvĂ© dans le pain cuit et comment Ivan Iakovlievitch lui-mĂȘme⊠non, cela, je ne le comprends pas du tout!
Another difficulty isâhow was the nose found in the baked loaf, and how did Ivan Jakovlevitch himselfâno, I donât understand it at all!
Mais ce qui est le plus Ă©trange et le plus incomprĂ©hensible, câest que les auteurs puissent choisir des sujets pareils pour leurs rĂ©cits. Cela, je lâavoue, est tout Ă fait inconcevable; cela, vraiment⊠non, non, cela me dĂ©passe.
But the most incomprehensible thing of all is, how authors can choose such subjects for their stories. That really surpasses my understanding.
En premier lieu, il nâen rĂ©sulte aucun bien pour la patrie et en second lieu⊠mais en second lieu Ă©galement, il nâen rĂ©sulte non plus aucun mal. Câest tout simplement un je-ne-sais-quoi.
In the first place, no advantage results from it for the country; and in the second place, no harm results either.
Et pourtant, avec tout cela, quoique⊠certes, on puisse admettre bien des choses, peut-ĂȘtre mĂȘme⊠et enfin oĂč ne se glisse-t-il pas certaines discordances?⊠Et tout de mĂȘme, quand on y rĂ©flĂ©chit bien, il y a vraiment quelque chose lĂ -dedans. On a beau dire, de pareils faits arrivent dans ce monde, rarement, mais ils arriventâŠ
All the same, when one reflects well, there really is something in the matter. Whatever may be said to the contrary, such cases do occurârarely, it is true, but now and then actually.
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